Published on: 1/27/2022IST

Getting a grilling

It feels increasingly like cars are styled to shock, rather than look attractive or even inoffensive. After all, it isn’t even Halloween yet and the Lexus LX is already wearing a ‘Scream’ mask. Front grilles, in particular, seem to keep growing larger – as our round-up reveals.

Lexus LX 600

The LX 600 is an upmarket version of the Toyota Land Cruiser. A massive version of Lexus’ trademark spindle grille is the most obvious way to tell them apart. With more chrome than a 1950s Cadillac, all the LX needs are a pair of tail fins. A job for the facelift…

BMW iX

BMW is king of the big grille at the moment, as exemplified by its new iX SUV. This being an electric car, the huge kidney is purely a styling feature, rather than used for cooling. It’s willfully ugly, although the car itself is very capable.

 

BMW X7

The X7 is the car that introduced us to big-mouthed BMWs. That huge grille looks slightly less OTT on a slab-sided SUV – but it still packs plenty of rear-view-mirror presence. Aerodynamic efficiency was clearly less of a priority.

 

BMW 4 Series

BMW then slapped its giant kidney grille onto the 4 Series coupe and convertible. Cue an internet meltdown. We can’t decide if it looks better or worse without a front number plate.

 

BMW X6

The X6 SUV coupe has a slightly more modest visage – unless you choose the illuminated grille option. Yes, really. Anyway, that’s quite enough BMWs for now…

 

Bentley EXP 100 GT

Nothing says “move over, peasant” quite like the giant matrix grille of the Bentley EXP 100 GT. This concept coupe is Crewe’s vision of a luxury car for 2035.

Aston Martin DBS GT Zagato

The Aston Martin DBS GT Zagato’s grille features 108 diamond-shaped carbon fibre pieces that remain flush when the car is stationary. Start the engine, however, and they “appear to flutter into life” as each piece opens, allowing the V12 to breathe. Coming to an influencer’s Instagram account near you soon.

 

Lexus RX

Here’s a slightly smaller version of the Lexus spindle grille on the RX. Some might call it overpowering, needlessly aggressive and ugly. Others might think it a welcome change from me-too design, especially in the crowded SUV segment. You decide.

 

Toyota Camry

On weekends, the Toyota Camry saloon likes nothing better than to lurk in the depths of the ocean, trawling for small fish before ‘hoovering’ them up with its great big grille.

 

Chevrolet Camaro ZL1

You’ve heard of the phrase ‘all mouth and no trousers’. In fairness to the Chevrolet Camaro ZL1, though, it has the 659hp V8 trousers to go with that gaping mouth.

 

Renault Laguna Coupe

A mouth befitting a bottom feeder isn’t always a bad thing. The rare Renault Laguna Coupe still looks superb – and very Aston Martin-esque – even with a front end that’s seemingly all grille.

 

Ferrari F12 TdF

Remember when Jack Nicholson played the Joker? Yeah, that. We still love the wild 780hp F12 TdF (Tour de France), though.

 

Aston Martin One-77

When you have a 7.3-litre V12 to feed, airflow is a big deal. Indeed, the Aston Martin One-77 had the most powerful naturally aspirated engine in the world when launched in 2009.

 

Peugeot 407 Coupe

How do you follow the beautiful, elegant and stylish 406 Coupe? If you’re Peugeot, the answer is the 407 Coupe. Oh dear.

 

Audi A8

In common with Lexus, Audi is going through a ‘big grille’ phase. It’s like Alan Partridge’s ‘big plate’ thing, but without the bacon and eggs. And good humour. And views on the pedestrianisation of Norwich city centre.

 

Ford Edsel

Time magazine likened the Edsel’s front grille to an “Oldsmobile sucking on a lemon”. Stick a Scream mask in there and you’d give children nightmares for years to come.

Mercedes-AMG GT R

In 1952, a vulture hit a Mercedes-Benz 300 SL driven by Karl Kling in the Carrera Panamericana race, shattering the windscreen and injuring co-driver Hans Klenk. A protective grille was placed over the windscreen to allow the racers to continue and subsequently win the race. The modern Panamericana grille is a nod to that famous race and incident.

 

Cadillac Eldorado

The 1959 Cadillac Eldorado was known for its huge fins and massive grille, complete with a jewel-like pattern. It’s an example of function and form working in harmony to great effect.

 

Toyota Corolla

Toyota wants to make sure everybody knows that the Corolla name has returned to the UK, replacing the Auris, which is why it has given the car A MASSIVE GRILLE.

 

Chevrolet Silverado

The Chevrolet Silverado is basically a pick-up attached to a grille. Chervolet’s take: if you can’t beat the Ford F-150 in the sales chart, simply pummel it into submission with a grille the size of New Hampshire.

 

1957 Chrysler 300C

In his book The Life of the Automobile: A New History of the Motor Car, Steven Parissien describes the 1957 Chrysler 300C as having a “yawning” front grille. Which is kind of apt, because you’re probably tired of looking at this selection of grilles. Still, we’re not done yet…

 

Bentley Mulsanne

Now we understand. By introducing the industrial-size grille on the Mulsanne, Bentley was merely preparing the world for the sheer horror/majesty (delete as applicable) of the illuminated grille on the EXP 100 GT. Like a warning from history.

 

Ford Ecosport

The Ford Ecosport: a car that makes a cross-eyed squid look like Scarlett Johansson.

Rover P5

A car so beloved of ministerial bigwigs just happened to sport a big grille. The Rover P5 is a rare example of a supersize grille being used to great effect.

 

Toyota Yaris

The US-spec Yaris started life as a Scion IA, but was given a Toyota badge when the Scion brand was phased out. If you’re looking for a supermini to remove the detritus from a fish tank, this is the car for you.

 

GMC Sierra HD

‘Bold’, ‘striking’ and larger’ are just three of the words GMC has used to describe the grille on the Sierra HD. This thing will devour insects and low-flying birds like Homer Simpson scoffing donuts at an all-you-can-eat night at Dunkin’.

 

Aston Martin DBS Superleggera OHMSS

In a homage to the DBS featured in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, the eponymous Aston Martin DBS Superleggera boasts a bespoke grille with six horizontal vanes. It’s not subtle, but it’s likely to be better than a grilling from Irma Bunt.

 

Toyota Passo

The facelifted Toyota Passo is the only car to be influenced by the astonished emoji. Probably.

 

Vision Mercedes-Maybach 6

This is the Mercedes-Maybach 6 concept car. Also, we must remember to clean the barbecue before the weekend.

 

Mercedes-Benz Vision Tokyo

Seriously, Mercedes-Benz, enough with the big grilles already. The Vision Tokyo adds neon lights, too.


 

Genesis G90

Genesis has eyes on the premium prize, which is why it has given the G90 a stonking great front grille. Well, if it’s good enough for the Germans, it’s good enough for Genesis.

 

Rolls-Royce Phantom

Rolls-Royce is the godfather of the big grille, but while its grilles are larger than Blenheim Palace, they never seem to look out of place below the Spirit of Ecstacy.

 

Dodge Caravan

The Dodge Caravan and Plymouth Voyager were early pioneers of the MPV formula. The front grille stretched across almost the entire width of the vehicle.

 

Spyker C8

Reviewing the Spyker C8 for Top Gear, Jeremy Clarkson likened the front grille to a “bottom feeder”, before saying that “it is Dutch… and they like that kind of thing”.

 

Toyota Avalon

The Toyota Avalon’s front grille is so big, legend has it that if you look hard enough, you’ll see King Arthur’s sword Excalibur.

 

Lincoln MKC

The front of the Lincoln MKC is as appealing as finding a nostril hair in your gazpacho.

 

Kia Telluride

Here’s another example of the Koreans hoping to mix it with the premium Germans by going large with the front grille. Thanks for sticking with us for the duration of this list. Coming next: the 30 worst things to find in your gazpacho.
 

1/27/2022 | | Permalink